Monday, 9 June 2014

The Hop Pole, Bewdley

Hash 311

Date: Thursday 5th June 2014
Pub: The Hop Pole, Bewdley
Beers: Sunbeam, EPA, Thatchers Gold cider
Food: meat/veggie lasagne
Hare: Cyclopath (with a little help from Dr Whiplash)
Visitors/virgins: James, Molly & ????

Trail: Cyclopath's countryfile conundrum 

Lots of hashers gathered at the Hop Pole on this rare lovely sunny evening for a Cyclopath special. Dr Whiplash had been drafted in to help & dutifully carried the rucksack, whilst Copulation was observed to have his sack well stocked.

Some were enjoying the sunshine so much they had forgotten their clothes! (not to mention the nettles) Whereas Who's The Daddy had just forgotten his lines...

After the briefing of the trail: flour, 5 and a half miles, no wammals & the warning of the main road, we set off up through the estate with the newest young hashlings Jody and William setting the pace. 

It wasn't long before we encountered the path beside the deserted park and a very narrow path down to the bypass, where Sprout was struggling with the air and Genital Reminder was struggling with his hair. 

Thank goodness for the first HH with some juicy jelly sweets, some sunshine, some shade and a flying worm!

The hare tried her best to maintain some order and coach us all in the right direction as Who's The Daddy was still oblivious to his responsibilities.

Over towards the golf course, Hash Quack was way out ahead leading folk astray whereas Cyclopath just wanted us all in the bushes.

The 2nd HH in the depths of the woods saw Hash Quack cajoling people to join her in the jungle and the newbies looking slightly scared, whilst Dr Whiplash and I competed for the best pics - I'll let you decide.

Back over onto the golf course again where Early Riser was missing his club and Doggy Fashion was now also having to beware of flying balls (following the aforementioned flying worm).

A gentle but muddy path downwards found Cinderella losing her bearings and Russell Sprout and Buzz Lightyear dawdling. I noticed the pungent aroma around us just before I saw the herd of cows heading towards the stile in the corner of the field that we needed to cross (no wammals?!)

The mowed path in the next field was apparently too obvious for Early Riser & Cleopatra and they took the scenic route through the buttercups instead... 

Shortly after, there was an altercation between Early Riser & Russell Sprout but the youngster came off much worse. Not to be outdone on the mud front, Shag decided to crawl under the stile - eeurgh! Dirty.

Hash Quack was regretting her lack of attire as she considered the nettles but all that was forgotten as Crossdresser top trumped Dr Jeckyll's horn - hilarious! (Cue Shag's video clip)

Back down to the estate & chaos ensued as the hare was too busy chatting, her assistant had given up his role and the group somehow split into three. 

That said, some of us made the additional 4th HH before the final chaotic dash back to the on inn. I say chaotic, we all thought we knew the way & all tried to go our own ways, only to be called back by Cyclopath, who then promptly left to go home & get changed!

Brilliant hash, beautiful countryside, wild flowers & wammals & posh lasagne to boot!

Down downs: awarded by Crossdresser to Cyclopath for the best hash ever - a lovely route, lots of flour plus road cones too! There were too many misdemeanours to choose from but here are the best: Hash Quack for being unusually hot; James for being the new recruit with big muscles & who's fast too - it's a good job he went home early as he was making our RA feel insecure; 
all the other visitors/virgins went home early too so missed out; 
Ilse for getting lost in translation last week; 
Doggy Fashion for her "claim to fame" story (or something); 
and finally to Early Riser for falling and fighting (Russell Sprout will be excluded even though he was included)
Apologies for being so cryptic but you should see what I have to deal with!!

Hot Lips x

Next week: The Dog Inn, Dunley, DY13 0UE - World Cup/Brazilian themed fancy dress

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